I was due to start my much mentioned Diploma in Massage two weeks ago. This the first trepidous step towards what I hoped would bring a career change. Sadly on the day it was due to start I had a call to say it had been cancelled due to not enough people wanting to do it. I find myself thinking "Is this my path?" This is the third time of booking and for one reason or another not starting.....I'm a big believer in the old adage 'things happen for a reason'. Right now those stars are not aligning.....Currently researching private providers - I prefer to be in the classroom, not distance learning.
I have been back at work on a phased return following my hysterectomy for three weeks now. I won't pretend it's been easy. The old overwhelming feelings and insomnia biting! I've been exhausted. The pooch has got used to me returning home and having a brew before I walk him - how dare I!!
We (as in work) had the good news that the NHS Trust we work for won the tender for our service to continue, followed by swiftly being told there isn't enough money in the pot to pay all of my team - so we go into consultation on the first of April, more stress, trying to secure our jobs, going up against colleagues. Not nice.
& so, I am sure you begin to see why the opening sentence - if you have carried on reading!!
This weekend has been about replenishing myself, ready for work, trying to sort out my head, get some clarity. This helps. Being right here. Mr.L has been looking after me, cooking nutritious meals, I have read, run, sorted out my wardrobe as discussed here and I will share later.
In the meantime I keep looking at this quote, written for me maybe?
Oh my. You certainly deserve replenishment following your surgery and now continuing with your sleep struggles. My oldest son has sleep issues and I can see the effects on his body and concentration. I remind him that there's a reason sleep deprivation is used as a form of torture, it truly affects our entire state of mind. And you my friend have been such a pillar of strength and determination despite it all. Sigh. I am so sorry to hear about the cancellation of your massage course although with your current exhaustion I wonder if it wasn't a blessing in disguise(?) I am sending you all my positive thoughts and prayers for your continual healing and I just have a gut feeling that clarity will follow your physical recovery-- as you focus on replenishing your body/mind I think you'll figure out what's next. I sense you're ready to move forward with something different and inspiring---and I'm so excited to see what's ahead for you!
ReplyDeletesending you a big supportive hug,
xo
Leslie
Oh Leslie, you are so lovely, I can feel your kindness. Thank you so much, for your words and taking time to comment.
DeleteI truly hope you're right!
Have a lovely week, XX
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